Unconditional love has been hounourly mentioned here and there, yesterday and future in the air by people. But the older I grow, the more experience I have in friendships, I dare to look down on any so-call unconditional love outside of one relationship - that is in family.

My colleague's brother recently after Christmas was dumped by his 3-year girlfriend. The reason given is: How I love you has changed, its not the same anymore.  

In love, in marriage, love grows and shades away (and may revive again). Very little number of existence could confidently reassure that their love never change. I don't care if its from yes- i love you, to no- the love is not there, because this occurs all the time. What I mean by the changes is the degree of love. Sometimes it could be so steaming chemistry between the two, and sometimes after a long while that used-to-be hot becomes beautiful companionship. This is still love, just in another level.

However, the parents' love for their children is so different from all sorts of love on earth. I remember my brother once shared with me an incident that he observed at the Premier Court where he works. There was an old woman crying wanting to see the judge, because she wanted to let the judge know her son, even though committed crime that involves people's lives, was innocent, was a good son, a good person. My brother's story really got me thinking: some people might be perceived by the others as the nasty bad, or even evil, to their parents, they are still human, good child and always deserve a second chance and forgiveness. That is unconditional love. The love wouldn't have the parameter to estimate the level or the amount, because its a life time love from the day that the baby was conceived.

Piotr has mentioned a lot about unconditional love at the beginning of our friendship. It kind of incepts females (or even male friends) surrounding him to give more than they usually do - because subconsciously everyone wants to be the better person, wants to trial themselves to let know that they could do unconditional-love thing. But come on...

As I emphasised earlier, there is no unconditional love in any relationships, with the only exception - parents' love to the children (sadly, I wouldn't be able to stretch it to say vice versa; but, didn't this irreversible flow make the parents' love more defined, more holy.).    

Since two years ago, my thesis pressure had been more under control, I started assisting his undergrads study. Especially for the statistic analyses course that he took last year at university, I spent 8 hours comprehending the knowledge, preparing for the statistic teaching material, and then further 4 hours minimum to teach him through. He passed - and it is the only one exam that he managed to pass without condition or compromise. This is that kind of favour that a person can give to her close friend with no conditional request for return. But I still wouldn't say that this is unconditional love. This is just an act of unconditional giving, because there is no expectation of what I want to receive from him in return. 

However, this unconditional giving (we can call it exploitable kindness) has its limits. Of course I honour the pleasure of being that person you can rely emotionally physically and realistically. But no one should always take. The always here isn't coherent with the concept of give and take, but it just asks for a short break in time, in space and in emotions. This exploitable kindness has the limitation in the capacity of physical durability and emotional stretchability. Once the favours have reached the limit, you are still pushing to get what you want, the ever-leftover love will start to take out and one day it becomes overdraft. A debt that no one can pay back as WE CAN'T GO BACK ANY MORE.