7/31

Through the LOST, I think I really find something…

The flashback is so nice!

Through the tears and anguish and sadness;

“I am relieved”, the first declaration is somehow unsure.

“I am relieved”, now he comes to understand! He smiles!!

“It’s time to let go”

They shall forever be family.  Though not in the way he expected. 

But it’s the best choice now…

“follow me”

He gave the final look.  Leave.

或許這也有點像是…向世界完全死透嗎?

如果說一個好的電影是能找出人類”命運”(or I’ll put it as “stories”)的共通點引起共鳴，或許上帝已經差派耶穌勝過一切的試探，成為最棒的電影

心情不知道為什麼很沈重，或許在短短的一陣子看到太多

自己愛的人  傷害/誤會/責罵  另一個自己愛的人

躲起來  保持沈默  似乎總是我能做的唯一的事情

當然我還知道就是  禱告

交給祢，放下自己的心。祢夠大，祢比我在乎，祢是自己所見證宣稱的那位，祢的計畫仍在進行。

8/1
It’s cool that everything can be related to you.   No wonder that you proclaim that you are the way, the truth, and the life.  Can my own profession, if I ever have one, done the same?

他說，沒問題的。我也很期待阿，我會為妳禱告的，妳爸媽也為妳禱告阿。

Yap, how lucky am I.  He held my hands so tight that I wonder what they said about that he was losing his strength.  Maybe this will be the last time I see him in this world, where everything will just pass away, where you told me everything is not reality.

好，所以妳理性上是這樣認定的，那妳的感受呢？妳對這樣的結局有怎樣的感覺，我問的不是你知道怎樣是對的，我問的是你的感覺。

I’ve been escaping to cope with my true feeling.  A good talk will really help you know more about yourself.  Something I fear seems to be just inevitable; those should be no longer my business or story.

我相信這是有很重大的關連的，你一直用理性把感性壓下去，你沒有處理你的感覺，所以就會越來越焦慮；所以，試著認真的處理他。

You say there is no emotion that is wrong.  Maybe I made a wrong connection in the past; maybe I’ve ignore it for such a long time—alone with You…

這樣聽起來我覺就是沒有自信，也因此self-value低，別人的value高，他就會去對別人好，說難聽一點就是討好別人，希望別人喜歡自己；這樣很可憐，因為會起起伏伏的，但是上帝不是這樣看我們的。

Love contains at least four steps.  First is understanding, at least making an effort to understand.  The second is acceptance.  Next is respect.  In Heavenly Father’s presence, there’s no need to build up a “good girl” image.  The Lord is the spirit.  And He cares for the real you, not the fake one you build.  Though he may not agree with our decision, he still accept us as who we are and respect us.  And in the end, he promise to be always by our side, always.  That what the song said about: “at the cross I bow my knees/ where your blood shed for me/ there’s no greater love than this…”

我知道這樣說有點老掉牙，但是我還是要說，你要很認認真真的將這件事情交在上帝的手中，要知道上帝要保守這件事情。用上帝的眼光看自己。

I told you it’s sometime so hard to do things a Christian should do, but you said “because it’s not to DO a Christian, but to BE one.”  Not only take it personally, but time to take it emotionally, maybe, if we can phrase it this way.  Talk to Heavenly Father, for you are the best consoler and the restorer :”)