2004-04-28 16:13:00捲毛
Losing the ground
Your words have been read. I dare not to say how much I know your words since so many mistakes and misunderstanding have occured. However, I wish I captured your words more or less with the point you intended to deliver.
To understand and to be understood are equally susceptible to vague words and habitual behaviours, even if readers are fully aware of the danger these words and behaviours might bring. I do beleive and have an experience of the beauty and elegance of yours. Meanwhile, I did suffer, more or less, from the way you try to communicate. May the latter be gone.
It is always not my intention or even a tiny threads of thoughts of putting my ways of living onto others. I lost my direction recently. I had a feeling of losing my ground of standing several times after having a talk. I know nothing that can help me and drag me out of the soften and miry land. My rationality counldn't work, neither could my sensibility for too many conflicting words and actions, accompanied with ill-transmitted and ill-interpreted saying, mounted. I cared so much about every sentence, every tiny reaction that one and other persons presented to me. The meaning of them were so amplified that I can barely tell their original faces. I crashed. knowing nothing. Becoming a person I couldn't recognise. Probably, I'm too eager to go after what seems lost.
If there is a possibility that I might be helpful, it definitely won't corss the boundry of being a reference; there is another way of living, whether you like or not, whether you appreciate or not, and whether you would accept or even take it or not. After all, everyone has been given a life and has a definite right to put colours on it. This belief seems to be just simple when written but so obscure when put into actions.
Would my "endeveaours" be like plain written words or actions in some kinds of field? I wish it won't bother me again at this moment and the coming months. But hardly can any wish be fulfilled as it were.
Lowering my pace, listening, reviewing my expectations,and
wishing.
To understand and to be understood are equally susceptible to vague words and habitual behaviours, even if readers are fully aware of the danger these words and behaviours might bring. I do beleive and have an experience of the beauty and elegance of yours. Meanwhile, I did suffer, more or less, from the way you try to communicate. May the latter be gone.
It is always not my intention or even a tiny threads of thoughts of putting my ways of living onto others. I lost my direction recently. I had a feeling of losing my ground of standing several times after having a talk. I know nothing that can help me and drag me out of the soften and miry land. My rationality counldn't work, neither could my sensibility for too many conflicting words and actions, accompanied with ill-transmitted and ill-interpreted saying, mounted. I cared so much about every sentence, every tiny reaction that one and other persons presented to me. The meaning of them were so amplified that I can barely tell their original faces. I crashed. knowing nothing. Becoming a person I couldn't recognise. Probably, I'm too eager to go after what seems lost.
If there is a possibility that I might be helpful, it definitely won't corss the boundry of being a reference; there is another way of living, whether you like or not, whether you appreciate or not, and whether you would accept or even take it or not. After all, everyone has been given a life and has a definite right to put colours on it. This belief seems to be just simple when written but so obscure when put into actions.
Would my "endeveaours" be like plain written words or actions in some kinds of field? I wish it won't bother me again at this moment and the coming months. But hardly can any wish be fulfilled as it were.
Lowering my pace, listening, reviewing my expectations,and
wishing.