這就是我上回介紹的《婦女百科全書》啦！
這種「維多利亞式」教育原本想把女生教得進退有節，可是稍一失衡就進退失據，實在不覺得哪兒高明。現在小孩就會直接說妳：「有心機！」

管真多！男生要是知道他的對象女生是這樣教育的，恐怕早就逃走了。

一千兩百頁。一本兩百元！

中國結打了兩年，最該好好唸書的那兩年。

連皮雕都教！

我真的按照食譜做過很多菜。

假如要看台灣的《最新婦女百科全書》那就得對照 JAMAICA KINCAID 的
”Girl” 啦！

上學期英文班上的【詮釋劇場】練習做得極好。學生必須將作品拍/攝成十分鐘短片(或 ppt 檔)。有一組同學兩人對戲獲得滿堂采。反串媽媽的男生把這個語氣演得傳神極了。


http://bcs.bedfordstmartins.com/virtualit/fiction/Girl/audio.asp
http://www.msu.edu/~peter422/index3.html (Interviews)


JAMAICA KINCAID: ”Girl”

Wash the white clothes on Monday and put them on the stone heap; wash the
color clothes on Tuesday and put them on the clothesline to dry; don’t
walk barehead in the hot sun; cook pumpkin fritters in very hot sweet
oil; soak your little cloths right after you take them off; when buying
cotton to make yourself a nice blouse, be sure that it doesn’t have gum on
it, because that way it won’t hold up well after a wash; soak salt fish
overnight before you cook it; is it true that you sing benna in Sunday
school?; always eat your food in such a way that it won’t turn someone
else’s stomach; on Sundays try to walk like a lady and not like the slut you
are so bent on becoming; don’t sing benna in Sunday school; you mustn’t
speak to wharf-rat boys, not even to give directions; don’t eat fruits
on the street--flies will follow you; but I don’t sing benna on Sundays
at all and never in Sunday school; this is how to sew on a button; this is
how to make a hole for the button you have just sewed on; this is how to
hem a dress when you see the hem coming down and so to prevent yourself
from looking like the slut I know you are so bent on becoming; this is how
you iron your father’s khaki shirt so that it doesn’t have a crease; this is
how you iron your father’s khaki pants so that they don’t have a crease;
this is how you grow okra--far from the house, because okra tree harbors
red ants; when you are growing dasheen, make sure it gets plenty of water or
else it makes your throat itch when you are eating it, this is how you sweep
a corner; this is how you sweep a whole house; this is how you sweep a yard;
this is how you smile to someone you don’t like very much; this is how you
smile to someone you don’t like at all; this is how you smile to someone
you like completely; this is how you set a table for tea; this is how you
set a table for dinner; this is how you set a table for dinner with an
important guest; this is how you set a table for lunch; this is how you set
a table for breakfast; this is how to behave in the presence of men who don’t
know you very well, and this way they won’t recognize immediately the slut
I have warned you against becoming; be sure to wash every day, even if it is
with your own spit; don’t squat down to play marbles--you are not a boy, you
know; don’t pick people’s flowers--you might catch something; don’t throw
stones at blackbirds, because it might not be a blackbird at all; this is
how to make a bread pudding; this is how to make doukona; this is how to
make pepper pot; this is how to make a good medicine for a cold; this is
how to make a good medicine to throw away a child before it even becomes
a child; this is how to catch a fish; this is how to throw back a fish you
don’t like, and that way something bad won’t fall on you; this is how to
bully a man; this is how a man bullies you; this is how to love a man, and
if this doesn’t work there are other ways, and if they don’t work don’t
feel too bad about giving up; this is how to spit up in the air if you feel
like it, and this is how to move quick so that it doesn’t fall on you; this
is how to make ends meet; always squeeze bread to make sure it’s fresh;
but what if the baker won’t let me feel the bread?; you mean to say that after
all you are really going to be the kind of woman who the baker won’t let near
the bread?


天下的媽媽都是一樣的........................嗎？