2010-11-30 02:40:18是個怪米菲
成為一個更好的人Part2
自從上次寫了成為一個更好的人後
妹妹說在小組跟大家分享
引起廣大迴響
妹妹也建議Ｒ先生可以把見證寫下來
這樣他們可以把他的見證跟更多人分享
以下就是他的見證（中文版晚點補上 我還沒時間翻）
My life from 2005~2010 is an interesting period in my life. But I’m sure there are plenty of other people who have gone through harder things than I did. But if you feel that this is worth reading, I hope it can bless you.
God did these things for me because He loves me. Now that I look back, every single one of these experiences was worth it because of the growths they bring me.
2005-06: Doing apprentice-teaching in the hardest-to-teach neighborhood in downtown LA. It was a hard school. Imagine you trying to teach a class with no real authority because you’re not a real teacher (yet), and the kids are from the hardest neighborhood in downtown LA. I learned a lot about myself and people in general there.
2005-06: Doing apprentice-teaching in the hardest-to-teach neighborhood in downtown LA. It was a hard school. Imagine you trying to teach a class with no real authority because you’re not a real teacher (yet), and the kids are from the hardest neighborhood in downtown LA. I learned a lot about myself and people in general there.
2006-07: Working full-time in East LA. And I was also writing my Master Thesis at the same time. During this time, I got the "full-body hive 紅疹" that lasted for more than a month. I remember I was just started to read the Book of Job, and I asked God: “Lord, please don’t tell me You’re gonna walk me through his experience as I read this book.” I asked because I had a strange foreboding that it’ll be like that. And it did. It was really hard to have to deal with the stress of knowing my classes will fall behind in my absence, worrying about my Master Thesis, and dealing with this crazy mystery-rash that keeps me up at night because it’s so itchy. I call it a mystery rash because I’ve never had this rash before, and my doctor/nurses couldn’t figure out what it really was. It looked and felt like mosquito bumps--except it was all over my torso, front and back. But I grew so much during that time I am now glad that God put me through it. It was well worth it.
2007-08: God took me to Silicon Valley--the process was a testimony on its own, but I’ll skip the details. Here in Silicon Valley, I stirred up a big controversy. What happened was, I showed students a documentary of the medical procedures of abortion, explaining each step. For that, I was kicked out of the school. That story was coverred by channel 5 CBS news and Newspapers. Pretty funny now that I think about it.
During this time, the Lord also showed me my areas of inadequacies (many). One of them was fear, various types of fears. I knew that I had several wounds and problems that stem from my troubled childhood. I also knew that whatever problems I still have will be passed down to my children and suffered by my future wife (whoever she is). It can also hurt the people I minister to in the future. So I prayed: " Lord, I want to break free from these inadequacies. I would rather die than to live with the knowledge that my problems end up being a source of cursing on my future family. So, You created me. You know the upper-limit of my pain tolerance. Crank it up to max, I want to grow as quickly as possible. I want to be a better man." After I prayed, I felt God’s presence came and told me: "I’ve been waiting to hear you pray that. I’ll make it happen." 2 weeks later, I was offered a job at a high school, and it was as bad of a work experience as anyone can imagine.
2008-09: Hired by my current principal. Tribulations began.
I was placed in one of the most anti-Christian school, packed full of people who not only are non-Christians but are offended at the idea of Biblical Christianity. (This is vastly different from the previous 2 public schools I worked in. This is not what schools are normally like).
Soon when I was hired, I learned that the staff in that school hated Christians. It was clear. When I openly admit my faith when asked, there is always a long silence with awkwardness on everyone’s face. So I was pretty much rejected as a Christian. On top of that, the school’s principal is a Jewish man who suffered many mockeries from Christians as a little child (he told me that), and he recruited many Jewish staff on campus--none of whom is Christian, of course. Every school staff is openly and unapologetically liberal--opposing almost every Christian value in politics.
I was placed in one of the most anti-Christian school, packed full of people who not only are non-Christians but are offended at the idea of Biblical Christianity. (This is vastly different from the previous 2 public schools I worked in. This is not what schools are normally like).
Soon when I was hired, I learned that the staff in that school hated Christians. It was clear. When I openly admit my faith when asked, there is always a long silence with awkwardness on everyone’s face. So I was pretty much rejected as a Christian. On top of that, the school’s principal is a Jewish man who suffered many mockeries from Christians as a little child (he told me that), and he recruited many Jewish staff on campus--none of whom is Christian, of course. Every school staff is openly and unapologetically liberal--opposing almost every Christian value in politics.
They can also be very malicious. For example, the student counsellors made up really negative, false rumors about my personal life to my students. The head of the history department would lie to me about meeting locations...etc.
A few weeks into the semester, the principal found out, through some back-door, sneaky method, about what happened to me at my previous school. He was furious. He made it clear to me that he "might" one day decide to fire me. And since then, he would go out of his way to make my life difficult.
For example, during meetings, he would make unprofessional comments towards me. Some of his conducts were so shockingly unprofessional even my colleagues who hate me were surprised by his behaviors. For example, in one of the meetings, after he went over some basic procedures, he suddenly turned to me, point his figure at me, and asked "you got that?"
What made things worse was that I could not afford to get fired.
What made things worse was that I could not afford to get fired.
Every new teacher in California needs to go through a 2 years of starter program called “BTSA” and complete it in 2 years, or they will lose their teaching credentials permanently. I could not finish that program when I was working in my previous school due to the abortion video incident, so if I cannot finish it here, I will run the risk of losing my credential. Not only that, I was supposed to be fined 8,000 fee for late completion.
Filled with fear, I prayed to God. And God told me: "He wants to fire you. But he can’t." I replied: "God, what’s there to stop him from firing me? My contract is at-will, he can terminate it any time." God said: "Just watch."
Soon after that, a series of events took place in my school (too complicated to explain it here). Long story short, these events made it hard for him to fire me.
In addition, I did not have to pay a penny to finish the BTSA program--to this day, I still don’t understand why I didn’t have to pay. This is all God’s blessing.
And God did keep His promise--I grew a lot during that time.
Soon after that, a series of events took place in my school (too complicated to explain it here). Long story short, these events made it hard for him to fire me.
In addition, I did not have to pay a penny to finish the BTSA program--to this day, I still don’t understand why I didn’t have to pay. This is all God’s blessing.
And God did keep His promise--I grew a lot during that time.
At the end of the school year, I decided to stay for one more year because I felt that I can still get more out of this if I’d stayed for 1 more year, so I did. My principal, as a person who was sneaky and sly, could not contain his surprise when he heard that I was staying for a 2nd year. His mouth opened and eye-brows raised and said: "you’re staying??" It was pretty funny.
At one point, God told me: "Look at your principal, isn’t he a master piece? Where else can you find a difficult boss like him? And look, you are the only Christian in this school--surrounded by hostile staff. I could have easily put another Christian in this school to be trained in the same way, but I didn’t because it might water down your experience. I saved this school, this whole school, just for you!" And upon hearing that, I was full of joy because I knew it was true. The amount of transformation that has taken place in that 1 year was simply amazing.
2009-10: working for an additional year and continued to grow. God is faithful. I decided to stay for the 3rd year because God told me to. Still, I learned a lot in this year.
2010-11: My last year here. I still find myself continually learning. But after this year, I’m taking a year off to fulfill my childhood dream--design a science reference book to help students learn biology.
At one point, God told me: "Look at your principal, isn’t he a master piece? Where else can you find a difficult boss like him? And look, you are the only Christian in this school--surrounded by hostile staff. I could have easily put another Christian in this school to be trained in the same way, but I didn’t because it might water down your experience. I saved this school, this whole school, just for you!" And upon hearing that, I was full of joy because I knew it was true. The amount of transformation that has taken place in that 1 year was simply amazing.
2009-10: working for an additional year and continued to grow. God is faithful. I decided to stay for the 3rd year because God told me to. Still, I learned a lot in this year.
2010-11: My last year here. I still find myself continually learning. But after this year, I’m taking a year off to fulfill my childhood dream--design a science reference book to help students learn biology.
A few things I learned:
- When I meet a brother/sister in Christ who is better than me in many areas, I rejoice because when you are on the battlefield, there is no sight more comforting than a capable comrade. Only those who are not in battles will be bored enough to see their own brothers/sisters as enemies due to jealousy.
- When I get into an uncomfortable situation, I ask God: “God, what are You trying to show me about myself? There must be a reason for me to feel this way, tell me WHY, so I can pray to You to fix it.” The 1st step of change is to be honest with yourself and avoid denial.
- When the Lord brings troubles into my life, He wants to shape me into a more glorious image. It’s true. To this day, I have not encountered a tribulation that God did not use to help me grow. And they are all worth it. If I refuse to change my shortcomings, the people closest to me will suffer the most. I should praise God for dealing with my shortcomings. Think of the story of Abraham. He has an issue of cowardice. Who suffered first? Sarah. His son, Isaac, did the exact same thing. If let alone not corrected by God, the weakness of the father will be passed down to his children.
- Courage is a choice. You choose "against" fear.
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(悄悄話)
2010-12-05 05:10:11