背著妳旅行

2009-04-13 09:04:16小北

無處逃離

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最近和一個朋友聊起人與城市的關係﹐說一個人永遠都逃不出一座城。所有短暫的離開都只是為了回歸。而囚禁我們的這座城﹐是誰也走不進的﹐因為牠只屬於我們自己。牠原是一座現實生活中的城﹐但經過了我們回憶和幻想的點綴﹐最終變成了僅僅存在於我們眼中的城。

這樣的對話讓我想起了希臘詩人卡瓦菲斯 (Cavafy),以及他關於城市的詩作 – The City。把這詩找出來﹐重讀了好幾遍﹐突然有把牠翻譯下來的衝動﹐於是就動了筆。

你說 [我將要去另一片土地另一片海洋

尋找另一座更美好的城

命運將我困在這裡

我的心如屍首般被埋葬

我要逃離眼前的廢墟

逃離這片侵蝕我多年的墳地。]

沒有另一片土地也沒有另一片海洋

因為這座城市時刻跟隨著你

你將會在同樣的街道里穿梭

在同一條巷子裡衰老

在同一棟房子裡看兩鬢斑白

你別想逃去另一座城

沒有船也沒有路

你的生活只屬於這一個

早已被你摧毀的小角落

卡瓦菲斯 1910

The City

You said, "I will go to another land, I will go to another sea.
Another city will be found, better than this.
Every effort of mine is condemned by fate;
and my heart is -- like a corpse -- buried.
How long in this wasteland will my mind remain.
Wherever I turn my eyes, wherever I may look
I see the black ruins of my life here,
where I spent so many years, and ruined and wasted."

New lands you will not find, you will not find other seas.
The city will follow you. You will roam the same
streets. And you will age in the same neighborhoods;
in these same houses you will grow gray.
Always you will arrive in this city. To another land -- do not hope --
there is no ship for you, there is no road.
As you have ruined your life here
in this little corner, you have destroyed it in the whole world.

Constantine P. Cavafy (1910)