My two roommates were back from Greece and came back to waterloo on Friday. It took me a while to get used to living with others—well since I’ve been living on my own for more than two months. And I came to the final conclusion that it’s good to live on my own (if budget allows).
One of my roommates is blind. I admire her a lot for what she does and the fact that she gets around life better than many sighted people.
It was peaceful for the first day after they arrived until I got this call from her mom. On the phone, her mom asked me for a favour. I was like, sure. And she went, Jessica is paying the rent for her room and no one else is allowed in the room. And then she said something like I moved her stuff during the summer. I felt I got smashed. I took it very seriously and I felt seriously pissed. I assumed that it’d take a lot for a mom to interfere like this. I didn’t do anything bad to her room. It’s not like I moved her bed or computer! I might’ve moved the chair when I watched TV (since half of her room is living room) but dude! I can’t remember where exactly the chair was in half a year ago when we moved it! Me and Jessica talked about this and solved the miscommunication last night. But still, her mom bitched me!
when everything seemed so upsetting and all the shitty things went on top of my mind. i got to live in the smallest room while we pay equal amount of money. I got to pay the bills instead of sharing with my roommates cause they were away traveling in Greece. I have to be very careful living with them just cause Jessica is blind and her dog eats everything from the floor. So I have to make sure everything’s clean and tidy and blah blah blah. Dude, I compromise a lot to live with them. Yet I never complained. I never thought I would, until this overprotecting mom bitched me.

Last night, I got to think about this bitchy mom. I got to believe that her whole life from the point of getting Jessica as her daughter was a lesson that some God wanted her to learn. I don’t quite believe in the myth that if you did something bad there would be consequence. But this time, I kind of do. Maybe that makes me feel better. I think this mom got to learn about how people would pick on her daughter, a disadvantaged person, and maybe it’s because she used to do similar things in her early life.
This is not always the case but I try to believe if we do nice things to others we’ll have a great life kind of thing. I think it’s call reciprocal or whatever.
And I thought about the time before I came to Laurier.
When I was in high school/junior school, I once had 7 roommates, in the same room. We got along ok. And the time in Hamilton. I don’t think me and Monica had any problem about living together in the same room. Now we got our own room, me and the Canadian roommates, and there is problem. I don’t get it. How does this happen? Is it all about this individualist culture where everyone gets his/her own space or whatnot? Is it just me not getting along with all these blondes? Or it’s them not getting along with me?
Last night, before me and Jessica actually talked about the problem; I didn’t feel like sitting at the table with them so I ate dinner in my bedroom. I felt so much safer, locked in my own room. I felt no one could hurt me, and I had all that I need in my own space. I was with myself, protecting myself, withdrawn.
Sometimes I got to think about self-esteem and discrimination all that crap. I think I have higher self-esteem when I’m in my own country. I discriminated people from other provinces, thinking that they were not as fashionable or even not as clean as we Cantonese are. Now I got to be discriminated. At least I feel that way.