我　此刻在想
該用中文或是英文呢？難道要ｃｏｄｅ－ｍｉｘ/ｓｗｉｔｃｈ？




就用ｓｔｒｅａｍ　ｏｆ　ｃｏｎｓｃｉｏｕｓｎｅｓｓ表達吧

I am always thinking about something. Natural. Just a few minutes ago there were many things in my mind that I’d like to write them down.but now when i am really typing, i don’t know where i can begin with...recently i...it is always a problem, for me, for my family. it is only a matter of time..yes...it is.but i don’t know how to deal with it, or do i want to deal with it? sometimes i do think i need sb’s comfort but immediately i hate to have this idea because it seems that i am ...well it is not me. i never want to ask for help. this is the place i choose...i know not many ppl knowing me would come here and discover sth they never know. i am selfish. just as i ’ve said. i don’t want to care about others. then i have no complaint that no one cares about me. or i don;t want to receive their care. if i don’t face the problem, will it vansih? If i have to face it, can God show me, He can, but WHEN will He show me the way? Or.is it because that I am not fully his daughter, i am indeed a siner, i am not a religious chrisian at all , that i dont even deserve His help? I guess i have tried to integrate into the community? but soon enough i found it didnt suit me. i think there’s no point to stay if i don’t feel it as my home? ...