Sometimes I just feel like I don’t belong in here – this skirt, this job, this city, this country, this earth.  Have you ever felt this before?  There’s something stuck in your throat and you wanna spit it out but you can’t.  I wonder if it is a scream in there.  I can tell that I miss someone so much that I can’t breathe.  Yet, I cannot name that person that I’m missing.  Is it the calling from my “soulmate” who exists somewhere else on this earth?  Or I should stop fighting with myself and simply admit that, I’m lonely.  The loneliness cannot be cured by bunch of people or tons of workloads.  It’s unsolvable.  My life is a mess.  I’m not sure how long I can hang in there.  I sincerely wish my time will come soon so that I don’t have to wait for nine more years.  I just hate it – waiting. 

"The Old Maple, Lake George" by Georgia O'Keeffe