I never feel comfortable with my senior high classmates. They are nice people, but I don’t belong to them. (Sunshine, you’re an exception.)

I was in an all-girl class in senior high. Those classmates were so feminine. They liked to talk about clothes, beauty, boys, and other girly stuff, just like any stereotypical girls. They read romance a lot, and they went out to have fun.

Compare to them, I was such a wecko. I had been a tomboy for a long time. Even though I was also in an all-girl class in junior high, most of those junior high classmates were just like me. We didn’t care about those superficial stuff, we didn’t read romance, we didn’t try to be ladies… We swore a lot, we did whatever we felt comfortable regardless our gender, and we never got self-conscious. Oh, happy day.

So, I was like a tomboy thrown into a group of girls. I felt so uncomfortable. All the girly talks annoyed me. Didn’t they have anything else to care about other than those superficial things? What about the world? What about the social justice? What about the war and hunger? What about the poverty? What about the sick?

I had clinical depression at that time so the whole thing upset me more. After all the years, I wondered whether I would still feel the same way about those classmates since my depression has gone.

They have a community on internet for classmates to get together. I rarely post anything there, but I watch what they do sometimes. I find that I still feel uncomfortable with them. They are still talking about entertainment and enjoyment, and they seem to take luxury for granted as if the entire world were meant to be this way. In their eyes, everyone on earth is as rich, happy and lucky as they are.

Now, you might wonder whether I am from a poor family where I can not afford it so I am being cynical. Sorry, but the guess is wrong. My father is considered to belong to the high class of the society, even of the world. So is my family. We are not poor or low class, but I have been brought up to live a low-pitched life. We dine out a lot, but rarely expensive restaurants. My mom and I (maybe I should say only I) love shopping, but we do not chase after big brands. We never go out and dress like a million to earn respect. We never take luxurious lifestyles for granted. We realize that there are many people that can not afford what we have. Many people out there are starving, needing help to meet the basic living requirement, living in a bad neighborhood, can’t afford education…

I am not gonna be hypocritical telling you that my family is rigid to ourselves in order to do charity for those in need. (My dad hates charity… Wecko!) What I am saying is that we do not take what we have for granted, and we don’t show off. I think that it is why I really can’t tolerate those classmates behavior. They show off they happiness which come from their well financial status. They do not take what they have as a privilege but a must. I have friends who can hardly afford their college tuition. I have college mates who desire to study abroad but can never afford it. I have a friend who could not even afford bus… I wonder how they will feel if they see my senior high classmates’ attitude. Those classmates are like Elle Woods. Sweet, smart, and lucky. But Elle Woods is insensitive to the world out there. They are just like the Chinese emperor that wanted the people to eat meat because they couldn’t even have vegetables for food…

Hey, look around! Take what you have as a privilege, not for granted!