Everyone’s got to find his/her special someone in time, no matter how long it takes. That one should not only be your beloved, but also your connected soul mate, your hall of famer, your chatting buddy, your hiding harbor, your lifelong friend and your interest sharer (It serves the same purpose the other way around). I don’t believe the saying that one can do without that special someone’s company. It’s just some fake, seemingly-strong excuse; it’s something for people to comfort and lie themselves when there is actually no one for them to hug, to cherish, to consult, to chat, to laugh with, to cry with, to share ideas with, and to reach a hand for them to hold.

Some people may say the role of friends or other role can do the same job. That’s bullshit. Totally.

Not only can’t the role of friends do it, other roles, such as jobs or kids, can’t, either. "Friends", "Job", "Children" and "beloved one" are actually FOUR different categories. These four are what make up our lives and all very important. No one can replace the function of one another. However, if we really wanna rank these four, my choice will be Love, Friends, Kids, and then, Jobs. Notice that I don’t use "Family" here but separate the idea of family into two categories, which are "beloved one" and "children". Most of the time, it’s okay to take those two as one, but one should know they are actually two different aspects to take into account, and it’s really crucial to treat them differently.

Close as friends can be, they can’t stay with you all the time, nor always be ready at the moment you need them. Of course, they can reach out a hand for you if you need it; they would support you in nearly every way; they would also, like your beloved, be your chatting buddies, your interest sharer and your hiding harbor. However, they do those things for you under certain conditions. I’m not saying that friends, being your support, ask for something for return. What I’m trying to say is that they just can’t always be there for you. They’ve got their own business to take care of; they’ve got their own problems to worry about. Only when they settle down their problems, concerns or whatever bothers them, can they respond to you. In short, FRIENDS and YOU are two individual parties, which can never be mixed together.

As for job. In my opinion, the stupidest people are those who put much of their emphasis on it. They just don’t understand. The only purpose of getting a job is to pay the bills. That’s all. People can always get a new and different job to serve that purpose, but they can never replace close friends and family members. If people get lucky, they will find something that would match their interest, or even get rich. If not, they just take the dull and lousy job, develop other things as their hobbits maybe, and simply want to make both ends meet. Still, some may claim that what they do for living is not just about money. There are other things they wanna go after. Achievement, accomplishment or success may be the goals. If they make it, that would be great. But have you considered why and how they made it? Don’t you think about how much support they’ve got from their friends or family? The answer is obvious. One can never do without friends and family. (One would sacrifice those things to make it. That’s possible but just too sad. I’d rather not give that credit.) Consequently, no matter how much money they can make and how great they can be in their fields, family and friends always come first.

What the multi-roles/meanings of special someone serve are far beyond anyone can imagine. The most distinctive one is the title of "I" becoming "WE", two becoming one. At first, it’s love that brings two people together, and as time goes by, something more than love grows to make their bond get stronger and stronger. It would be commitment, cross dependence, trust, promise, admiration and support, along with their lasting love, that tighten up those two beloved ones. The bond, then, between the two is so tight that no one can tear it apart, that those two become one, A COUPLE should be the exact word to describe it, that those two continue their lifelong journey, carrying love and things beyond love all along, and that two individual lives have their "true-love snapshot" found and completed.

(The idea of true-love snapshot comes from "The Five People You Meet in Heaven", by Mitch Albom.)

People may ask: where is romance? They may state (note the word "state" I use here to show how strong they feel about it!!) that romance can make dull life more interesting and get refreshed a bit, especially facing annoying everyday routine stuff. True. It would be great if, once in a while, a couple is soaked in a joyful pleasure they create delicately. I’m not gonna argue that. However, let me put it this way. The idea of romantic affairs is just like icing on the cake. The cake is everything that counts. Instead of fancy dressing or great pleasure every now and then, what people should focus on FIRST is the cake, the whole thing, the ingredients mixed together. I just don’t understand. Why is that so many people go the wrong direction, emphasizing the icing, the romance, too much that they neglect what’s essential and waste time chasing something unrealistic and then finally get their spinning head straight, but spend more time regretting? (One of the answers I can think of right now is that they are poisoned by the movies and soap operas too much. They don’t try to, or want to understand that it’s just some dirty trick those producers use, trying to sell.) Only when the cake itself is delicious as hell, is the icing thing taken into consideration THEN. In short, a couple should work on the ingredients in life to get along, to become each other’s soul mate, to make the excessive passion of love last, in some other form maybe, forever. Then and only then can we take about romance.

What about the category I haven’t mentioned, "kids"? Well, in my viewpoint, the second dumbest people are those who always hold children as their No. 1 priority. We’ve seen so many people, especially here in Taiwan, keep the lousy relationship with the wrong one only for the sake of the kids. It’s true that child is one of the imperative elements that consist of a family or a couple’s life. Nevertheless, have you thought about that one day children will have their friends to go with, their business to take care of, their own life to deal with, their special someone to carry on their journey and their own family to raise? At that point, the only thing you can do is let go even if you don’t want to. It’s also true that an incomplete family, without a mom or a dad, will more or less do harm to the kids and maybe affect their ways of thinking when they grow up. But with a seemingly-complete but unpleasant couple, would their children be happy to see that? I doubt it.

At any rate, with all the shit I spat above (you can disagree with me of course), what I wanna wind up is that the only one that would stay with you, keep you company all the way, back and forth, up and down, to the end of the journey is your "special someone", not your buddies, not your successful or lame career, not your lovely children. As you realize it, you know what I’m talking about.




I kinda knew it during the period that my mom’d tried her very best to bring back my dad.

I fully realized it the moment I saw my grandma stay at the bed with my ill grandpa all the time, and I mean "every minute and every monent" in the hospital......