《中英對照讀新聞》Haunted toilet馬桶「卡到陰」

◎陳成良

A Kent librarian wants an exorcist called in to sort out a haunted lavatory.

（英國）肯特郡一名圖書館員想請驅魔大師來解決廁所鬧鬼的問題。

Gordon Jenns, 61, who has worked at Gravesend library for 14 years, says the ghost flushes the toilet when he thinks everyone’s gone home.

現年61歲、已經在格雷夫森德圖書館任職14年的戈登．詹斯說，在他以為所有人都已回家之際，有鬼魂替馬桶沖水。

"It’s happened three times in the past 11 years, always around seven o’clock on a Friday," he told the Bexley Times.

「這種情況過去11年間發生過3次，總是週五約7點時發生，」他告訴伯克斯里時報說。

"It’s very off-putting. The first time it happened I thought someone had broken in the back door so I went with something very heavy in my hand to give them a warm welcome.

「這令人不勝其煩。第一次發生時，我以為是有人從後門闖入，因此我手持重物，準備給他們一個熱烈的歡迎。」

"I’m absolutely certain the toilet flushed itself. The door was locked and the cistern was still filling up when I went in.

「我絕對確定是馬桶自己沖水。門已經上鎖，而且當我進去裡面時，水箱還在加水中。」

"I’m an ex-marine and not prone to hallucinations. I’m guessing the poor fellow only wants to relieve himself."

「我以前是陸戰隊員，不容易出現幻覺。我猜想，那個可憐傢伙只是想上廁所。」

新聞辭典

haunted：鬧鬼的，為haunt的過去分詞。例句：The old castle is said to be haunted. （那座古堡據說鬧鬼。）

exorcist：名詞，驅除惡魔的法師。經典恐怖電影「大法師」英文片名即為The Exorcist。

off-putting ： 令人厭惡的。例句：Her sleazy gossip was very off-putting. （她那低級的閒話令人倒胃口。）

relieve oneself： 原意是「放鬆自己」，俚語中則是「上廁所」的委婉說法。其他同義的婉稱還有︰go to the men’s（ladie’s）room／restroom／washroom 或wash one’s hands。

來源：自由時報

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