last night, I received a message. like this past week i've been drowning myself in my own folly and cheer in hiding the secrets that was about to pop out. it was just folly, i'd say. last night, while I sat in the concert hall feeling unloved and forgotten. i heard someone sitting next to me say, with a wry smile on her face, "yeah, life *is* tough...." who'd know what meaning it entails!!!!!!!!!! for the lord who so loved the world i'd never understand why he gives us those challenges that we may never understand. for our lives are so worldly and so full of materials, how could we even try to throw away our desires...

but for everything you said last night, it gave me a serious ponder on what sort of person i need to grow into. just because my planned life looks like it'll be ending soon, perhaps it's just like me trying to write something meaningful here, but ended up dictating something that hasn't even gone through my little brain!?

to be honest, it's real time to dump the shit and make it into something useful. there's no such time of waiting any more.