文/ 季翔2003.12.18
(刊登於2005.9.12論壇報2491期)


年輕時，一個人很孤單，很孤獨，覺得那種滋味不好受，就像20年前美國人Tom曾經對我說過，我希望妳不要經歷我所經歷過的孤寂，「 I live by myself and I have one cat for company. Many times I am lonely and I think of you often. I hope you do not go through the loneliness I go through. I hope you have many friends who are close. 」

多年之後，現在有夫有子，卻驚覺一個人的世界是很享受的，享受輕鬆、享受自由自在的空氣。

一個人，帶著一本書，上圖書館，沒有人打擾，自己和自己對話、自己和自己相處；自己的心、自己的靈任我飄遊；寫下自己、記錄自己，是很美的一刻，我喜歡這樣的感覺…..

一個人，帶著自己的思緒去登山、去鄉野、去親近大自然，我和一草一木對話，我對著天空呼喊我的夢想、我對著山野哭泣我的悲歌、我對著溪流訴說我的情懷……..，我和我的靈魂再度相遇……，在山中。

當然，會覺得很享受孤獨，是因為還有一位主，默默地陪伴著我，雖然我看不見祂，卻感受得到祂的同在，祂的同在撫慰我受傷的心靈。我覺得與我的主悄悄對話，是件很舒服、很釋放、很享受的感覺，就像一對親蜜的戀人，深深地被瞭解，深深地被愛、被擁抱。


P.S.圖片取自pchome,發表人:貝妮-奧地利風景

Enjoy loneliness

I was lonely, very lonely when I was young. And I didn’t like it at all.
Just like Tom, the American, said to me, I hope you will not experience
the loneliness that I have. ”I live by myself and I have one cat for
company. Many times I am lonely and I think of you often. I hope you do
not go through the loneliness I go through. I hope you have many friends
who are close.

After so many years, I have a family of my own. But, I realize that it’s
actually quite enjoyable to be alone, enjoy relaxing and enjoy the fresh
air.

Alone with a book, I go to the library. I talk to myself and get along
with myself. I wander with my heart and my spirit. And I write down my
thought, record my feeling. It is a precious moment and I really like it...

I climb the mountain alone. To the field. To the nature. I talk to the
tree and the grass. I shout to the sky about my dream. I sing to the
field about my sorrow. I chat with the stream about my feeling. I meet
my soul again... on the hill.

Of course, being able to enjoy loneliness is because that the Lord keeps
me company. Even though I can’t see Him, I know I am in His presence. In
His presence, my wounded heart is healed. It’s quite relaxing, enjoyable
and comfortable to dialog with my Lord. It’s like being in love with
Him. I’m completely understood, loved and embraced.