I have this colleague of mine, whom I've grown akin to lately, who's the most interesting person you could ever meet. And interesting not in an ostentatious way, mind you.

First of all, she's incredibly confident. Confident as in she can strike up a conversation with anyone, anywhere, and make everyone involved naturally take a liking towards her. She's super friendly, super easy to get along with, but at the same time she's super cool. Normally you find people who are super friendly are usually losers - sorry to be blunt, but usually they are unattractive and don't know much about fashion. Or you'll get people who are good looking, friendly perhaps, but you'll never relate to on a soulful level, they somehow manage to make people feel intimidated. She has the best of both worlds.

On top of her incredible personality, she's extremely switched on. Sure, she's a lawyer which means she's academically capable, but when I say switched on I mean she has such clarity over the most complicated things, even someone as narcissistic as I am bow at her ability to handle situations. I won't disclose the details but let's just say I have so much respect for this girl to the point I actually probed her about her thought process. She told me it's the weekly church session she's been attending since a child that had sculpted her the way she is.

You kidding me? You mean GOD taught you all these? I asked incredulously.

Yes, she said, and you should come to a session.

I believe I looked dumbfounded then because I'm an atheist and don't give a shit about Christianity, plus I thought all Christians were suppressed homophobic righteous sadistic losers obsessed with pontificating afterlife because they don't achieve anything in present life - I admit I was a bit biased, she inspired me to think maybe I should give religion a try if she's the example of a good Christian case. Yes she's this much inspirational to me.

Today, I found out she lost her father at three years of age.

I don't know how she is the way she is, she's such a delight to be around, and you'd be so proud to be her friend because she gets a lot of positive attention, she helps people, she talks direct and never play games, she cares genuinely, she has her insecurities but hell I've got more insecurities and so does everyone, she's funny, just...such a delight to be around. She's like this ray of light that shines into my small, dark room of pathetic life filled with unnecessary self loathing and self pity, she's so much that I want to be, right here, in my life! Could I have possibly find a better role model? Could God truly have been looking out for me, all this time whilst I doubted His existence?

I have no explanations. I have plenty of inspirations.

I want to be a better person, I really do. I want to like myself more consistently, and unabatedly, and I want to have the mental strenth that she had shown me possible. And if that means I need to spend a Sunday afternoon at church, then yes, I'm going.