奉命翻譯

A 65 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. 

一老婦人心臟病送醫院

While on the operating table she had a near death experience.. Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?" 

在手術台上，她有了一次瀕死的經驗。她見到了上帝，她問﹕我的時辰到了嗎？

God said, "No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live." 

上帝說，不，你還可以活33年兩個月又八天。

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. 

恢復期間，她決定繼續留在醫院，作拉皮，吸脂，隆乳和瘦腰等手術。

She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. 

她還叫人來替她染髮，漂白牙齒。她覺得，反正還要活那麼久，就好好的打理一番吧。

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance. 

最後一樣手術後，她辦好了出院手續，在回家途中，橫跨馬路時，卻被一部救護車撞死了。

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 33 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?" 

面見上帝時，她質問說﹕我記得你說我還有33年好活，為什麼你不把我從救護車的輪下救出來？

(You'll love this) 

（你一定會覺得好笑）

God replied: "Shit! I didn't recognize you."