2008-07-21 16:23:25YV
一個大導演小時候的小作業
http://www.screenonline.org.uk/tv/id/946293/
1994 年，有一個學校的大一英文課老師用了一本補充課本，裡面有一篇文選來自英國劇作家 Harold Pinter, 前年的諾貝爾文學獎得主，劇名叫做 A Night
Out。 這部戲的第一景主要是講一個老媽媽情緒勒索他的二十八歲兒子，千方百計阻止他出去參加公司的送別晚會。
ALBERT: Mr. Ryan’s leaving. You know Ryan. He’s leaving the
firm. He’s been there years. So Mr. King’s giving a party, not a
party, just a few...you know...anyway, we’re all invited. I’ve got
to go. Everyone else is going. I’ve got to go. I don’t want to
go, but I’ve got to.
MOTHER [bewildered, sitting]: Well, I don’t know...
ALBERT [with his arm round her]: I won’t be late. I don’t want to
go. I’d much rather stay with you.
MOTHER: Would you?
ALBERT: You know I would. Who wants to go to Mr. King’s party?
MOTHER: we were going to have our game of cards.
ALBERT: Well, we can’t have our game of cards. [Pause.]
MOTHER: Put the bulb in Grandma’s room, Albert.
ALBERT: I’ve told you I’m not going down to the cellar in my white
shirt. There’s no light in the cellar either. I’ll be pitch
black in five minutes, looking for those bulbs.
MOTHER: I told you to put a light in the cellar. I told you
yesterday.
ALBERT: Well, I can’t do it now.
MOTHER: If we had a light in the cellar you’d be able to where
those bulbs were. You don’t expect me to go down to the cellar?
ALBERT: I don’t know why we keep bulbs in the cellar! [Pause.]
MOTHER: Your father would turn in his grave if he heard you raise
your voice to me. You’re all I’ve got, Albert. I want you to
remember that. I haven’t got anyone else. I want you to remember
that. I haven’t got anyone else. I want you...I want you to bear
that in mind.
ALBERT: I’m sorry...I raised my voice.
(He goes to the door.)
[Mumbling.] I’ve got to go.
MOTHER: [Following]: Albert!
ALBERT: What?
MOTHER: I want to ask you a question.
ALBERT: What?
MOTHER: Are you leading a clean life?
ALBERT: A clean life?
MOTHER: You’re not leading an unclean life, are you?
ALBERT: What are you talking about?
MOTHER: You’re not messing about with girls tonight?
ALBERT: Don’t be so ridiculous.
MOTHER: Answer me, Albert. I’m your mother.
ALBERT: I don’t know any girls.
MOTHER: If you’re going to the firm’s party, there’ll be girls
there, won’t there? Girls from the office?
ALBERT: I don’t like them, any of them.
MOTHER: You promise?
ALBERT: Promise what?
MOTHER: That…that you won’t upset your father.
ALBERT: My father? How can I upset my father? You’re always
talking about upsetting people who are dead!
MOTHER: Oh, Albert, you don’t know how you hurt me, you don’t
know the hurtful way you’ve got, speaking of your poor father like
that.
ALBERT: But he is dead.
MOTHER: He’s not! He’s living! [Touching her breast.] In here!
And this is his house! [Pause.]
ALBERT: Look, Mum, I won’t be late...and I won’t...
MOTHER: But what about your dinner? It’s nearly ready.
ALBERT: Seeley and Kedge are waiting for me. I told you not to cook
dinner this morning. [He goes to the stairs.] Just because you
never listen...
(He runs up the stairs and disappears.)
YV 的平時作業是要同學在不知劇情發展的情況下寫出續集。（這個作業 Yoyo 和 JB 也都寫過！）
學生的各種反應都令人驚艷，既然劇中 Albert說他不喜歡女生，小作家就安排他變成同志。「善良體貼」的學生就讓 Albert 帶媽媽去參加宴會，後來媽媽和老闆 Mr. King 譜出第二春；耐心不足的小作家就讓 Albert 上樓去 Bump Bump, 自我了結；更沒耐心的讓 Albert 帶槍下來，連媽媽一併了結；大概常常開溜的傢伙讓 Albert 拿起一條長繩子……綁在窗上，從二樓溜出去參加派對。每一種都恨精采，也讓我們知道八點檔對十八歲青年的影響。這時候出現了一張寫得很潦草的作業， YV 明明叫他不必上課，用 project 取代的呀！他在高中時候參加托福考試就已經得 620 分了！
他這樣寫的：
MOTHER: Albert. You come down here right this minute.
ALBERT: No, Mother! I’m getting dressed for the party.
MOTHER: Well, at least finish your dinner before you go.
[Silence...Suddenly Albert came down the stairs.]
ALBERT: Look, Mother! I am not finishing no Goddamn dinner. I’m
going to a party. If I’m going to a party, I’m going to eat
there. I don’t need your dinner! I’ve had it with you!
MOTHER: But, Albert...
ALBERT: Don’t you Albert me! Don’t you Goddamn Albert me! I’ve
had it with your way of making me do things. That sorry eyes, the
way you look at me. The fucking way you look at me. You make me
feel guilty as hell, you know that. [With tears in his eyes.]
And so you know why, Mother, that sometimes I don’t come home at
night? No. I’m not in no Goddamn office working late hours! I’m
outside, outside fucking. Fucking bitches. Two-dollar hookers!
That’s what I’m doing! [Mother starts to cry.]
There you go! But I’m not finished! Yes! I’m going to this
party, and yes! There will be girls! I’m going to get flat drunk
and wake up, sleeping by a naked bitch I’ve never seen before. So
don’t you Albert me like I’m still your little virgin! I am sick
of being your wet dream! Accept the fact, Mother. I’m not going to
be the same little innocent boy anyone. Accept it, Mother.
[Suddenly a loud voice yells, “Albert! Dinner is cold.” Albert
wakes from his imagination and sighs. He is still in his room.]
ALBERT: If only I could really say that to her.
[Albert yells downstairs.]
I am coming down soon! Be in a minute, Mother.
後來我寫了兩篇有關性別與學習的小論文都引用過這一個作業。我問他可不可以放進我的論文，他只笑笑說：「又要用一次，可是這也沒有寫得很好呀！」
他的同學在期末考的時候都看到這一個「續集」，好不好大家都知道！
他是誰？上回說過了，就是【九降風】的導演呀！
1994 年，有一個學校的大一英文課老師用了一本補充課本，裡面有一篇文選來自英國劇作家 Harold Pinter, 前年的諾貝爾文學獎得主，劇名叫做 A Night
Out。 這部戲的第一景主要是講一個老媽媽情緒勒索他的二十八歲兒子，千方百計阻止他出去參加公司的送別晚會。
ALBERT: Mr. Ryan’s leaving. You know Ryan. He’s leaving the
firm. He’s been there years. So Mr. King’s giving a party, not a
party, just a few...you know...anyway, we’re all invited. I’ve got
to go. Everyone else is going. I’ve got to go. I don’t want to
go, but I’ve got to.
MOTHER [bewildered, sitting]: Well, I don’t know...
ALBERT [with his arm round her]: I won’t be late. I don’t want to
go. I’d much rather stay with you.
MOTHER: Would you?
ALBERT: You know I would. Who wants to go to Mr. King’s party?
MOTHER: we were going to have our game of cards.
ALBERT: Well, we can’t have our game of cards. [Pause.]
MOTHER: Put the bulb in Grandma’s room, Albert.
ALBERT: I’ve told you I’m not going down to the cellar in my white
shirt. There’s no light in the cellar either. I’ll be pitch
black in five minutes, looking for those bulbs.
MOTHER: I told you to put a light in the cellar. I told you
yesterday.
ALBERT: Well, I can’t do it now.
MOTHER: If we had a light in the cellar you’d be able to where
those bulbs were. You don’t expect me to go down to the cellar?
ALBERT: I don’t know why we keep bulbs in the cellar! [Pause.]
MOTHER: Your father would turn in his grave if he heard you raise
your voice to me. You’re all I’ve got, Albert. I want you to
remember that. I haven’t got anyone else. I want you to remember
that. I haven’t got anyone else. I want you...I want you to bear
that in mind.
ALBERT: I’m sorry...I raised my voice.
(He goes to the door.)
[Mumbling.] I’ve got to go.
MOTHER: [Following]: Albert!
ALBERT: What?
MOTHER: I want to ask you a question.
ALBERT: What?
MOTHER: Are you leading a clean life?
ALBERT: A clean life?
MOTHER: You’re not leading an unclean life, are you?
ALBERT: What are you talking about?
MOTHER: You’re not messing about with girls tonight?
ALBERT: Don’t be so ridiculous.
MOTHER: Answer me, Albert. I’m your mother.
ALBERT: I don’t know any girls.
MOTHER: If you’re going to the firm’s party, there’ll be girls
there, won’t there? Girls from the office?
ALBERT: I don’t like them, any of them.
MOTHER: You promise?
ALBERT: Promise what?
MOTHER: That…that you won’t upset your father.
ALBERT: My father? How can I upset my father? You’re always
talking about upsetting people who are dead!
MOTHER: Oh, Albert, you don’t know how you hurt me, you don’t
know the hurtful way you’ve got, speaking of your poor father like
that.
ALBERT: But he is dead.
MOTHER: He’s not! He’s living! [Touching her breast.] In here!
And this is his house! [Pause.]
ALBERT: Look, Mum, I won’t be late...and I won’t...
MOTHER: But what about your dinner? It’s nearly ready.
ALBERT: Seeley and Kedge are waiting for me. I told you not to cook
dinner this morning. [He goes to the stairs.] Just because you
never listen...
(He runs up the stairs and disappears.)
YV 的平時作業是要同學在不知劇情發展的情況下寫出續集。（這個作業 Yoyo 和 JB 也都寫過！）
學生的各種反應都令人驚艷，既然劇中 Albert說他不喜歡女生，小作家就安排他變成同志。「善良體貼」的學生就讓 Albert 帶媽媽去參加宴會，後來媽媽和老闆 Mr. King 譜出第二春；耐心不足的小作家就讓 Albert 上樓去 Bump Bump, 自我了結；更沒耐心的讓 Albert 帶槍下來，連媽媽一併了結；大概常常開溜的傢伙讓 Albert 拿起一條長繩子……綁在窗上，從二樓溜出去參加派對。每一種都恨精采，也讓我們知道八點檔對十八歲青年的影響。這時候出現了一張寫得很潦草的作業， YV 明明叫他不必上課，用 project 取代的呀！他在高中時候參加托福考試就已經得 620 分了！
他這樣寫的：
MOTHER: Albert. You come down here right this minute.
ALBERT: No, Mother! I’m getting dressed for the party.
MOTHER: Well, at least finish your dinner before you go.
[Silence...Suddenly Albert came down the stairs.]
ALBERT: Look, Mother! I am not finishing no Goddamn dinner. I’m
going to a party. If I’m going to a party, I’m going to eat
there. I don’t need your dinner! I’ve had it with you!
MOTHER: But, Albert...
ALBERT: Don’t you Albert me! Don’t you Goddamn Albert me! I’ve
had it with your way of making me do things. That sorry eyes, the
way you look at me. The fucking way you look at me. You make me
feel guilty as hell, you know that. [With tears in his eyes.]
And so you know why, Mother, that sometimes I don’t come home at
night? No. I’m not in no Goddamn office working late hours! I’m
outside, outside fucking. Fucking bitches. Two-dollar hookers!
That’s what I’m doing! [Mother starts to cry.]
There you go! But I’m not finished! Yes! I’m going to this
party, and yes! There will be girls! I’m going to get flat drunk
and wake up, sleeping by a naked bitch I’ve never seen before. So
don’t you Albert me like I’m still your little virgin! I am sick
of being your wet dream! Accept the fact, Mother. I’m not going to
be the same little innocent boy anyone. Accept it, Mother.
[Suddenly a loud voice yells, “Albert! Dinner is cold.” Albert
wakes from his imagination and sighs. He is still in his room.]
ALBERT: If only I could really say that to her.
[Albert yells downstairs.]
I am coming down soon! Be in a minute, Mother.
後來我寫了兩篇有關性別與學習的小論文都引用過這一個作業。我問他可不可以放進我的論文，他只笑笑說：「又要用一次，可是這也沒有寫得很好呀！」
他的同學在期末考的時候都看到這一個「續集」，好不好大家都知道！
他是誰？上回說過了，就是【九降風】的導演呀！
要是妳也會想把它打成一題，
放到期末考去當 bonus 吧?!
NICE ONE THERE!
真的是好有戲劇張力喔!