怎麼說，


我真的很討厭being myself,


每次只要意識到我是我，


我就很希望自己是someone else~


the number 23裡面有一句話，


金凱瑞說的,


No one will love me.



我害怕這是個事實，






我總覺得我沒有哪一點值得我所有的好朋友們喜歡我，




我就算再怎麼小心，還是傷害到我不想傷害的人，


我再怎麼努力嘗試變聰明，還是做錯一推事，


努力的保護自己，結果也沒有比較快樂。



我強迫自己，一個人，


不要害怕孤單，


不要怕一無所有，


不要太在意我所在意的，


因為我總是mess everything up!!!


Fuck myself!


i hate the feelings that my mind tries to control my heart,


while my heart is beating against my mind.


recently, i wake up by nightmares,


thinking about them until i fall asleep and have another nightmare,


then wake up again, going to school, feeling awful,


sounds bad,


but the truth is what i try to escape from,


that thing will come to me at night,


things i cant face or admit in the day,


thay all find me in my dreams.


how to deny and how to hide?



my lines ( i was in a small play at school)



We set up barriers to protect who we think we are,


then one day we got stuck behind this barriers,


and we cant get out!





我知道複雜的心情，


也許會在我心中盤旋個沒完沒了，


所以我才會一口氣吐露這麼多...


再不說出來，我會爆炸。