2006-10-10 09:46:15靜心.
enjoy, have fun ~^^
1) DON’T LOOK AT NAKED LADY
Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
Boy 2: B’cos my mum said that if I look at a naked lady,I’ll turn into
stone. A part of me is getting hard already!
2) NAMES OF WIVES
A Malay man had 4 wives, and he called his ...
4th wife..... baby doll
3rd wife.....china doll
2nd wife.....barbie doll
1st wife..... panadol !
3) RESEARCH FINDING
Research shows men are fatter than women because every night men get fresh
milk & 2 big papayas while women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon
of starch!
4) ARAB MAN
An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
"Your name please?"
"Abdul Aziz".
"Sex?"
"Six times a week!!"
"No, no, I mean male or female!"
"Doesn’t matter, sometimes even camel!"
5) SERVICE
Sex is like a restaurant.
Sometimes you get "full satisfactory service", and sometimes you have to be
satisfied with "self-service".
6) HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of < >.
Son on the cover of < >.
Mistress on the cover of < >.
and ... Wife on the cover of "Missing Persons".
7) SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.
8) GOOD AMBITION
Teacher: What do you want to become?
Little Johnny: Doctor!!
Teacher: Why?
Little Johnny: Coz it’s the only profession where you can tell a woman to
take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.
10) DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: "It’s so painful, I’ll rather have a baby than
have a tooth removed."
Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I’ll adjust the chair accordingly."
11) VIRGIN
Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die, wanted her tombstone to be read :
"BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN".
The engraver shortened it to: " RETURNED UNOPENED ".
11) OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
75-year old man got married to a 15-year girl.
On their first night both were crying - why???
Coz she didn’t know anything, and he had forgotten everything.
Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
Boy 2: B’cos my mum said that if I look at a naked lady,I’ll turn into
stone. A part of me is getting hard already!
2) NAMES OF WIVES
A Malay man had 4 wives, and he called his ...
4th wife..... baby doll
3rd wife.....china doll
2nd wife.....barbie doll
1st wife..... panadol !
3) RESEARCH FINDING
Research shows men are fatter than women because every night men get fresh
milk & 2 big papayas while women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon
of starch!
4) ARAB MAN
An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
"Your name please?"
"Abdul Aziz".
"Sex?"
"Six times a week!!"
"No, no, I mean male or female!"
"Doesn’t matter, sometimes even camel!"
5) SERVICE
Sex is like a restaurant.
Sometimes you get "full satisfactory service", and sometimes you have to be
satisfied with "self-service".
6) HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of < >.
Son on the cover of < >.
Mistress on the cover of < >.
and ... Wife on the cover of "Missing Persons".
7) SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.
8) GOOD AMBITION
Teacher: What do you want to become?
Little Johnny: Doctor!!
Teacher: Why?
Little Johnny: Coz it’s the only profession where you can tell a woman to
take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.
10) DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: "It’s so painful, I’ll rather have a baby than
have a tooth removed."
Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I’ll adjust the chair accordingly."
11) VIRGIN
Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die, wanted her tombstone to be read :
"BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN".
The engraver shortened it to: " RETURNED UNOPENED ".
11) OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
75-year old man got married to a 15-year girl.
On their first night both were crying - why???
Coz she didn’t know anything, and he had forgotten everything.