7th Dzogchen Penelope Rinpoche

第七世 竹慶本樂仁波切

You would certainly recognize your signature on a piece of paper, but do you know your own emotional signature? We all have one. It's our predictable way of reacting to situations. Your friends probably recognize your emotional signature better than you do. When you get into a fight with your partner, for example, they can predict just how it will go. They know if you're likely to slam a door, storm out of the house, or call your mother. They know if you'll be processing the argument for days or immediately shut down and clam up. How do they know so much? They know because they've seen it all before. Our behavior may seem spontaneous to us, but to those who know us, we're not too surprising.

你可能可以很確定的認出自己的簽名(signature)，但你知道你自己情緒的特徵(signature)嗎？我們會都有，那是我們對於某些事情，預期會有的反應。你的朋友們可能也可以認出你的情緒特徵，甚至幹的比你還好。當你開始和你的夥伴爭吵時，舉例來說，他們可以預測事情後來會如何演變，他們知道你可能要去大力的摔上門，衝出房子或著打電話給你的媽媽。他們知道:你會不會再吵幾天，或是馬上停止與冷靜下來。他們怎麼能知道這麼的多？這是因為他們之前曾經看過這些反應。我們的行為對我們而言可能是自然的發生，但對於這些熟悉我們的人，我們並沒有出乎意料。

Why don't we pay more attention to understanding our own patterns? We may have a solid financial plan worked out that will buy us a house and pay for our kids' college and our retirement, but we don't give much thought to getting the most benefit out of one of the most precious resources for happiness -- our emotions. Often, we just leave it to chance.

為什麼不多花點注意力在了解我們的行為模式？我們可能有一個很牢固的財務計劃，可以讓我們買個房子，可以付小孩的學費與我們的退休計劃，但我們卻很少下功夫在能使我們快樂的最重要資源上，也就是情緒。常常，我們只是順其自然。

We may not like to admit it, but we're creatures of habit. We have our daily routines all worked out. It's how we keep our busy lives simple and convenient. We don't have to decide every day whether we'll walk to work, take the bus, or drive. We even fall in love and handle our relationships in predictable ways. Just as we have our daily routines, we have habits of thought and feeling that keep our emotional life simple. We don't have to guess who's going to pay the bills and who's going to spend most of the money (although we may talk about it a lot). We have our own special ways of telling our partner, "I'm annoyed with you, don't talk to me," or "I'm bored, so I'm not really hearing anything you're saying."

我們也許不喜歡去承認這一點，但我們是有習慣性的生物。我們有一套固定的生活方法。那就是我們如何在我們忙碌的生活中保持簡單和方便。我們沒有必要每天去想，要走路去上班，還是搭公車或是開車。我們甚至戀愛和處理我們的人際關系的方法都是可預測的。就像我們的日常生活，我們有習慣性的想法和感覺可以讓我們情緒化的生活保持簡單。我們不用去猜，誰要去付帳和誰要去花大筆的錢(儘管我們老是在講這個)。 我們有自己的方式去告訴夥伴，”我現在生你的氣，不要跟我講話”，或”我現在很煩，所我沒聽見你說的任何事。

When we're hurt, scared, furious, or jealous, we don't have to figure out how to show it. Our emotional triggers are set; they go off in the same ways again and again, carrying us to the same places every time. If we have a habit of blaming, we accuse. If we have a habit of withdrawing, we disappear. If we have a habit of controlling, we threaten. Everyone else we know may be able to predict how our patterns will play out, but we're often blind to the process. Even when we can predict how we'll react, it usually doesn't change the outcome. There's a popular saying that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. We resist the idea that this anger or this jealousy isn't justified. We may not like it, but we don't see how to avoid pulling the trigger.

當我們傷心，恐懼，憤怒或嫉妒，我們不用去想要如何展現出來。我們的情緒開關已經設定好了，它們被相同的方法一次又一次的觸發，而每次都帶我們到一樣的結果。如果我們有責備的習慣，我們會去指控。如果我們有退縮的習慣，我們會消失。如果我們有控制的習慣，我們會去威脅。認識我們的人，都可能可以預測我們的行為模式會如何進行，但我們常常對這些過程視而不見。即使我們可以預期我們會如何反應，但那通常不會改變結果。對於精神錯亂有一個常用的定義 : 一次又一次做相同的事，但卻期待著不同的結果。我們不同意”這個生氣”和”這個嫉妒”是不公正的說法。我們可能不喜歡它，但我們看不出如何避免去按下這個開關。

In spite of all the challenges they pose, there's nothing wrong with having emotions. According to the teachings of the Buddha, emotions are a fundamental part of who you are -- an expression of our basic intelligence and creative energy. When you can connect with the essence of your emotions, you can respond without preconceptions and judgments. Then you can explore and get to know your emotions without reacting immediately to their energy, and they become a source of wisdom and compassio n. Your emotions can open your mind and your heart. They can lead you beyond your habitual patterns into new territory. They can teach you generosity, patience, and courage. It's only when you don't allow yourself to feel your emotions or when you distort their energy that you can get into trouble with them.

儘管它們有這些問題，但是有情緒並沒有錯。根據佛陀的教導，情緒是”你是誰”的基本成分，是一種我們根本的智慧與創造力的展現。當你可以與你的情緒的本質連上線，在你反應時將不會先入主的判斷。然後你可以探索與了解你的情緒，而不會馬上對它們有所反應，再來它們就變成了智慧與慈悲的來源。你的情緒可以打開你的智慧與你的心，它們可以帶領你超越你習慣的模式到一個新的領域。它們可以教你慷慨，耐心與勇敢。也只有當你自己不讓自己去感受你的情緒，或是扭曲它們，它們才會造成麻煩。

When we operate primarily on the basis of our habitual patterns, we run into problems. At the first flash of emotion, we move so quickly into our habitual ways that we completely miss that first moment. It was so authentic -- it could have told us so much. But we never even saw it or felt it. We've already lost touch with the fresh, creative energy at the core of our being and skipped to our usual way of expressing our anger or jealousy. The regrettable words have been said, the door has been slammed.

當我們主要的行為模式在運轉時，我們碰到了些問題。在情緒出現的第一個瞬間，我們很快的就跑進了習慣模式，以至我們完全錯過了第一個瞬間。它是這麼的真實可信，它好像可以告訴我們很多，但我們從來沒看到或是感覺到它。我們已經失去了身心中最核心的清明與創造力，同時也直接跳到我們平常的展現我們瞋怒與嫉妒的模式中。那些令人後悔的話已經說出，門也已經被摔上。

We're also very judgmental of our emotions. If we think they're too raw, if we think they're impolite, we try to dress them up with positive thoughts and make them more respectable. When we manipulate our feelings this way, consciously or unconsciously, we're trying to get them to match up with our familiar emotional signature. But that's just another way to lose our connection to their vitality and wisdom.

我對於我們的情緒非常有判斷力，如果我們認為它太粗糙，如果我們認為它太粗魯，我們會試著用正面的想法去裝飾它們，使它們看起來更高尚。當我們如此加工我們的感覺，無論有意或無意，我們正試著讓他們符合我們所熟悉的情緒特徵。但那就是另一條讓我們失去與它們的活力與智慧斷線的路。

The Message of Our Emotions

我們情緒的訊息

If our partner hurts our feelings, offends us, or shocks us, we can't even name the intense emotions we feel at first. The feelings haven't yet formed into anger or any other solid emotion. For a moment, we're suspended in a space of pure openness, where anything is possible. If we can just stop and remain in that space for a moment -- without any answers or judgments -- we have a chance to connect with the wakeful qualities of our emotions and hear their message. Especially in crises of the heart, our emotions are the first responders, but if we jump to conclusions too soon, it's like we're ignoring their instructions. They're trying to tell us which pathways are clear, and where the emergency exits are (this way to insight, that way to humor -- and if all else fails, leave before you do something you'll regret). If we don't pause and listen to our emotions, we might just end up running back and forth inside a burning building.

當我們的夥伴傷害了我們的感情，冒犯了我們，或對我們說髒話，我們卻連我們一開始感受到的強烈情緒也無法說的出來。那個感覺還沒形成生氣或任何堅固的情緒。在當下，我們暫止在一種純粹開闊的空間當中，在那兒所有事都是有可能的。如果我們可以停止和維持在那樣的當下中，沒有任何回應或是評論，我們有機會與情緒覺醒的特質連上線，同時也能傾聽它的訊息。特別在危急時的心，我們的情緒是第一個反應者，但我們結論下的太快，就像是我們無視它們的指令。他們在試著告訴我們哪裡豆是清晰的，哪裡有緊急狀況(用這樣去洞察，那樣去幽默--如果一切都失敗了，那在你會做下會後悔的事前離開。)如果我們不暫停和傾聽我們的情緒，我們到最後可能就來回的跑入一幢燃燒的建築物當中。

If we're going to understand ourselves, much less another person, we have to look beneath our patterns and face our emotions in their natural, undisguised state. When we're stuck at the level of our habitual dramas, it's like going through the day half awake, barely conscious of the world's brilliance. Some part of us may like this half-asleep state, where nothing is too bright, too energetic, or too unknown. But another part of us can hardly wait to be free, to take a chance, to see what's on the other side of the mountain.

如果我們正準備要去了解自己，更不用說其它人，我們必需要看看我們模式的下方，同時面對我們的情緒它自然，不偽裝的狀態。當我們卡在我們習慣的情節中，那就像經歷了半天的清醒，幾乎沒有意識到這世界的光彩。我們之中有些人可能喜歡這樣半夢半醒的狀態，所有東西都不會太明亮，太有活力，太未知。但其它人迫不及待要自由，要把握機會看看有什麼在山的另一邊。

How do we get unstuck from these patterns so we can respond to our experiences spontaneously?

我們要如何從這模式中脫離開，使得我們可以自然的反應我們所經歷的？

We don't have to change everything about who we are and what we do. As the Buddha taught, we can return to a state of simplicity and relaxation through the practice of mindfulness. We can begin by pausing and bringing awareness to our thoughts and emotional reactions. We can take one small step at a time towards waking up in the present moment. That's where we hear a note of music and feel its life force. It's where we enjoy a laugh, soothe our aches and pains, and feel our heart opening.

我們沒有必要去改變我們是誰和我們做什麼。正如同佛陀所教，我們可以回到簡單和放鬆的狀態中，透過練習覺察。我們可以從暫停與覺知我們的念頭與情緒反應開始。我們可以每次練習前進一小步，直到在當下覺醒。那就是我們聽到音樂，並感受它的生命力，那就是我們享受大笑，撫慰我們的疼痛和痛苦，與感覺到我們敞開了心。

Everyone's emotional signature is different, but we all share the experience of being alive. We all know the joys and sorrows of love and hate, hope and fear, altruism and self-centeredness. And we all instinctively know that life, despite all its challenges, is precious. So, it just makes sense to look into the life we have and find ways to make it as meaningful and happy as possible. After all, we don't throw money away or put artwork in the trash with our junk mail! We take great care of our personal assets, and one of our most valuable and misunderstood resources is our emotions. To become free of the unhappiness they can cause in our relationships, we only have to respect and accept our emotions, moment by moment, and be willing to work with them.

每個人的情緒特徵都不一樣，但我們共同分享活著的經歷。我們全部知道愛，恨，希望，恐懼，自我中心與利他所帶來的歡樂與悲傷。我們也全都知道生命儘管有很多的挑戰，它都是珍貴的。所以，這就說明了去看看自己的生命，儘可能的去找出方法讓它有意義，與快樂。畢竟，我們不會把錢丟掉，也不會把藝術品丟到垃圾桶。我們花很多功夫在照顧自己的私人財產，我們最有價值與被誤解的資源就是我們的情緒。要從這些造成我們不開心關系中解脫出來，我們只要尊重與接受我們的情緒，每個當下，和願意與它們合作。