2020-03-15 10:28:39夏寒

Good Bye

Good Bye 3/14/2020


Today is my son's 21 year birthday.  He mentioned he wanted to move out with his friends. Their school cancelled their event for Saturday he was really upsetting.  My Godparents and I throw him a birthday party.  I made birthday cake myself the first time.  My husband and I always gave him ice cream cake.  I want to bring a new tradition.  He soon is to be independent on his own as I try to find him summer internship.

Due to Coronavirse that safe distance is 6 feet so there is no sales made so far.  My modeling viedo show postponed till next week and just apply art model gig and wait for approval.  Travel plan had been postponed and no one can come into USA.  Now it is your best excuse that you can't come home to me.

Just want to inform you, it is your decision to be the Sweden art gallery owner that I missed or my husband that asked me not to go to a date with that art gallery owner.  Many suitors have shown up one after another and I informed them about your existing.  I will decide which man among you to settle down.  I am not sure if I will choose you or not.  I already told you I will never fall in love with you if you never show up in front of me.  Seven months now I don't see you want to make us work.  If any man among you make move before you, I will have to let you go.  You will be again that Sweden art gallery owner that I will always wonder what if.  It is your choice and I just want to let you know first.

The memories of that Sweden art gallery owner will always be there and let me wonder in my remaining life forever as I don't remember what he is all about.  You have given lots of great memories too.  Now I have to admit that will only just memories even though I hope you will be the one I chosen and by Coronavirus outbreak we've given impossible to ever meet in real life.  From you said I am not ready till you did not come back for Valentine's, I already know the answer that you finally will be that art gallery owner that I will miss again in my life. 

You have said God brings you to me and now he took you away.  Power above has making the decision for us.  I am really sad as nothing ever work after seven months we pull and push each other.  I miss you like crazy but I will just have to accept the sign that I have been receiving. 

Let another lucky girl to fulfill your dream for you.  I thought as long as I fight we could be together.  Guess I was so wrong.  You will never to be mine to begin with and time for me to wake up.  Seven months I hold down and somehow you are like a kite flying into sky.

Thanks for being with me all this time.  I will always remember those nights we text each other and how you are like my husband's spirit guided me all this time.  I wish I could be that lucky girl hold in your arms and shared life with you.  That is just all to be my dream as I wake up everything back to reality.

I did not abandon you as the world today we just have to accept it.  I may not ever love any man like I love my husband.  I just want someone to be by my side.  Somehow that someone is no longer to be you.

Hearing your hello the first time make me finally know you are real.  I am glad to finally hear your voice the first time and the last time too.

Please take care of yourself during this health crisis and you will always be in my heart deeply.  I will always remember seven months of us. Just everything will be just memories!


今天是我兒子21歲生日。他提到他想和他的朋友們搬出去。他們的學校取消了他星期六感到非常沮喪的活動。我的 父母和我給他舉行了生日聚會。我第一次做生日蛋糕。我和我丈夫總是給他冰淇淋蛋糕。我想帶來一個新的傳統。當我設法找到他夏季實習時,他很快將獨立自主。

讓另一個幸運的女孩為您實現夢想。我以為只要奮鬥 我們就能在一起。猜猜我錯了。您將永遠不會成為我的開始,也不會讓我醒來。我堅持了七個月,不知何故,你就像風箏一樣飛向天空。