I've got 3 staff working for me, I have to learn how to be a better leader.

So far the relationship between everyone is smooth, as we are all at the stage of getting to know one another. What my concern is, how do I keep the standard high while being friendly with everyone?

Here's my summary of the characteristics of a good leader, someone I want to become.

1. No great mood changes. A true leader needs to be a stone - solid, steady and trustworthy. I want to be the person people come to with questions looking for leadership, so I can't display too much mood swings, I will stick to reasoning and rationale for answers.

2. Be flexible with the process, but stern with the results. I should ask for the results relentlessly, but be flexible and open minded about how people derive to the results. Some people enjoy being guided every step of the way and then repeat the process (which is what I like, I like to teach people my way because internally I believe it's the best way), but some people has their own ways of doing things. Now their ways may not necessarily be the most efficient, but I can't expect everyone to follow suit on how I do things, and I should allow people to learn at their own pace. STEP BACK does not hurt.

However that doesn't mean I'll compromise on the results, only AFTER people had their way and didn't achieve the results should I show them how things should be done. I should at the beginning, communicate to them the standard expected of them.

3. No insecurities. I find sometimes I can get quite insecure for no apparent reason. When I'm insecure I stammer, I speak nonsense, or I show my weakness too easily, I make myself an easy target for the nasty ones which will reinforce my insecurities. So as a leader, I shall not be insecure. I deserve to be respected and looked up to, it's my responsibility to show the girls what a successful and confident career woman looks like.

4. Be kind and generous. I have find that at times I can be bad, narrow minded, laugh at other people's expenses, and very thrifty. No body likes a penny pincher, I'm not going to splurge my money but at the same time I need to not display any blatant thriftiness.

5. Be wise and always educate myself. Always be pushing for more knowledge, learn the craft better, and always be generous to share the knowledge learnt. It is a good thing that my people become better than me, if all source of knowledge comes from me then I'm just creating a trap for myself.

6. Follow on from the previous point. I need to trust that people are equally as smart as I am, and trust their decisions, listen to their rationales. Most of all, I shall practice to be okay when people surpass me, make better decisions than me, I shall be happy instead of feeling threatened. I need to learn how to be a democratic leader, not a dogmatic dictator.

So far from my goals, so much to learn yet.